I’ve experienced a recent reprieve and from there came a revelation about my thinking. I’m generally OK with my current physical state of being. I feel good, no aches and pains or health issues and I have plenty of energy, mental and physical, to keep up most days!
One thing has really been wearing me out. Over the last 3 or 4 years my eyes have been plaguing me – seeing, both up close and at a distance, became more difficult. I’ve had glasses or contact lenses since about the age of seven and my vision has become progressively worse over time, but nothing out of the norm – just not great eyes!
I love to read. When asked what my hobbies are, reading is the only answer I’ve ever had – a pretty tame pursuit I know, but I’ve lived some great adventures in my head! I believe that I’d do very well on a desert island as long as I had an unlimited supply of books. So as reading became increasingly difficult I got a little panicky. I worked through the progression of mono-vision, then bi-focal and finally multi-focal contacts. I have a couple of pair of glasses – bifocal and progressive (whatever that means!) that require way too much thought about the appropriate neck positions for various activities of life – one angle for reading, another for computer work, take them off to speak face to face…too much!!!
Two years ago things got worse and, rather than go back to my eye professional, I resorted to ‘layering’ my eye wear – multi-focal contacts topped with reading glasses for any close up work. The definition of ‘close up’ expanded and the readers increased in strength and numbers – a pair in every corner! That worked, and I gathered a little collection of cheap ‘cheaters’, and my husband even found me a little pair that I can stick to the back of my cell phone! Great invention you should check out by the way – ThinOptics . I was however getting fearful – I really couldn’t see! What’s next? My solution was to procrastinate and skip my annual vision checkup. It made sense at the time!
So, now for the reprieve! I finally couldn’t take it anymore and scheduled an appointment. I described my situation and fears and then succumbed to the battery of drops, measurements, air-puffs to the eye, and futile attempts at identifying letters and shapes on a faraway wall. I held my breath for the diagnoses – scary possibilities flooding my imagination. Unexpectedly and much to the doctor’s amazement, my vision had improved. I am no longer as severely near-sighted as before and this improvement was causing me to struggle because my contacts and glasses were too strong—-WHAT!!! So now, with lower-strength contact lenses and no reading glasses at all, I’ve been reading non-stop with no problem. I feel like a kid – or at least like a 40-year-old!
OK, here comes my life-changing revelation. I had assumed the worst – for two or more years the ever-popular “old age is hell and it’s all downhill from here” line of thinking, led me down a foggy path. As a result, I over-corrected and effectively limited and aged myself. Why did I automatically conclude, without investigation, that I was deteriorating in some way? I wonder why my first thought wasn’t “Wow, I guess my eyes must be getting better!” Wouldn’t that be a great way to live! How else could this approach impact my health and spirit, my present and future pursuits? Thanks to my newly cleared-up eyes and mind, I can continue to see and explore the big, bright universe of information and inspiration – I’m sure there’s more to be revealed!